The one thing I think women should know about breast reconstruction is that it's not all it's hyped up to be. They cut your boobs off and then they try to make you new ones. You no longer have nipples, the ones that they graft on you permanently stand up and are called "projectiles".

The only good thing about breast implants is that you feel bouyant. I swear to God that in the event of a water landing I can now be used as a flotation device.